I’ve been getting the question quite a bit. “Are you still working out?”
“Are you still doing that Crossfit stuff?”
I used to sugarcoat my answer. “Well, you know, just a little.” Meanwhile my friends would be snickering behind my back calling attention to my obvious lie.
In the beginning truly was a lie. I was still working out 4-5 times a week; at my local box for three days and running the other days. I felt fantastic during my workouts. Maybe a little too good with the extra hormones as juice.
I “participated” in this workout a few weeks ago. I went for fun and accidentally got a workout in the process.
As time went on, I slowly decreased the amount of weight I was lifting, the pace I finished my workouts and watched my heart rate like a hawk – all at the advice of my pregnancy consultant and OB husband. I must admit, it was hard to slow down. It was torturous to watch my friends tear it up in the gym while I purposefully hung back and finished in second, third or fourth place. But never last. My ego couldn’t handle that.
I even remember the moment out on a trail when I first felt the baby shift down as if getting comfortable for our run that day. It was a strange feeling but I enjoyed our time together.
I was fine. The baby was fine. I passed all my tests, the ultrasounds looked great and the baby’s heart rate was where it should be. I gained a little weight and kept everything steady. So what is all the fuss about?
And then third trimester hit.
Like a brick.
All of a sudden, I wasn’t slowing down on purpose. I was just slow. I wasn’t watching my heart rate to make sure it didn’t go too high. It was just high no matter what. I wasn’t doing just enough to stay out of last place. I was doing just enough to look like I was working out with the group.
Then one day during a run, the baby shifted down and never moved back up.
I could feel the baby hanging low. It hurt, I was uncomfortable and not sure what to do. Hughan was out to town. I thought about going to the office but I went home instead and sat down. My friend told me to rest on my left side. My mind agreed any idea for rest was a good one.
So I did. I also resolved it was time to chill out. I had a goal to continue working out past five months. I blew past that mark with flying colors. Now, here I was sitting on the couch completely alone and in pain for no good reason.
What was I trying to accomplish? I didn’t have anything to prove, or gain or loose. I had an ideal in my head of the perfect pregnant woman. She is a superwoman who does everything she’s always done while carrying a baby. But she isn’t me.
I can’t keep up with my own life. I’m no longer even trying.
I’ve put my non-pregnant workouts on ice for a few weeks (just to get through this patch), I’m not trying to cook world-class cuisine for dinner every other day, we eat out more then once a week and I put my feet up whenever possible.
For the next few weeks, it’s the new Nekeidra. Just relax and enjoy!